80's Mormonism was the very best kind of Mormonism

I was on the phone with my sister yesterday, talking about my week, and how I had recently observed the sacred Christmas tradition of seeing Micheal McLean in the Forgotten Carols. Her response, to my horror, was "Oh groan, Micheal McLean is such a hack!" ! What! Does she even HAVE a testimony?!? Now, don't get me wrong, I can understand a little of her feelings, I hate country music for the emotional manipulation (Jesus Take the Wheel, ugg, Jesus help me to not beat Carrie Underwood with her own geetar) but it fits just perfectly in the bounds of an earnest, cheesy, nerdball religion like mormonism. I mean, come on, Three Kings DID Find the Lord, and So Can WE!

It made me think of all of things that I really miss from mormonism at it's most awesome, like, for example, where did all the roadshows go? Why do I get mostly blank stares when I reminise about a little chastity variety show called A Time for Love? When did our life become so complicated that we could no longer determine who our bad friends were by waiting for them to break into songs about zero population being the answer (and no, sir, you are not my friend).

You know, I'm not saying this with one of those sarcastic bemused smirks we all like to wear nowadays to make ourselves look smart. I really did learn alot from those nerdball experiences of my youth. I really did want to date boys who would "just warm me and not burn me" leaving me "only good things to remember". I really did learn from Saturday's Warrior that the best friends you will ever have on this Earth are the ones you were born with. I really did learn that Sister Smith, when given the role of Roadshow Director, would get so drunk with power that she would demand no one make direct eye contact while she tried to get Timmy to carry the Liahona with the right emotional heft and elevate this "two bit dinner theater crap into something IMPORTANT!"*

But really, those cheesy moments made an impression on my young mind. I still get teary when I read my kids a bootlegged version of My Turn On Earth because, take the dorkiness away and what you get is some real gospel truths, and, while we still have the truths, a spoonful of cheese does help the medicine go down (it also works well with crackers). It just makes me sad that this growing generation will hear a little more about putting thier flippin phones away during a lesson and a little less about celebrating the light, so our joy will burn bright, when we follow the right, and keep the Lord in our sight, and my pants fit too tight, I think I'll go fly a kite... what were we talking about?

*This might not have actually happened